Overcoming Incontinence: From Shame to Living Life to the Fullest

Sponsored by NorthShore February 14, 2024

Going to Extreme Measures to Avoid Diapers

E. Shares His Story

The emotional aspects of incontinence can take a toll on a person. For me, my incontinence began after I fell down an escalator backwards in 2015, breaking my ankle in four places and damaging nerves to my bladder. Eventually, I was diagnosed with a paralyzed neurogenic bladder, but it wasn’t an easy process. I endured multiple urology visits, medications, and embarrassing tests – all in an effort just to stay dry. I even went as far as trying intermittent catheterization. Eventually, I received a more permanent suprapubic catheter, but ended up needing it removed a few months later due to an infection. The entire process was incredibly hard on my body – all to avoid wearing diapers.

And even though I still wore them throughout this period to manage my incontinence, it was the emotional toll that the idea of diapers took on me that drove me to continuously seek out more extreme measures. Embarrassment was my biggest motivator. Unlike other medical conditions and their treatment protocols, I knew incontinence and diapers carried a stigma, and the fear of people finding out was one of the hardest parts. I worried about what my friends would think, what my parents would think, and how I would ever start dating again.

But the end of the day, all my biggest fears and worries were baseless. I found a terrific partner; my parents have been supportive; and my friends have all been amazing. Have I had embarrassing moments? Of course. But life is full of embarrassments. And my life went on.

Over the years, my health has declined, and I have faced many more challenges. From dealing with doctors of all specialties and surgeries to an amputation and becoming a wheelchair user, my health has gone awry in any way you can imagine, and I’ve certainly had my share of ups and downs. But wearing diapers has never stopped me from doing what I want. I might have to prepare a bit more that the average person, making sure I have enough supplies on hand, and be a little more cautious in my clothing choices. But in the end, diapers have allowed me to live my life without constant worry. Diapers have given me freedom.

Managing incontinence is extremely stressful. Shame, embarrassment, isolation. But it doesn’t have to be like that. With the right product, you can live your life to the fullest. I never thought my life would be like it is today. I didn’t think I would be in diapers at the age of 45. But I have a great support network, a loving partner, family and friends, because I have been so candid about what I’m going through. When this all started I thought my life was over. But it was just beginning.